I was talking with a friend of mine the other day - a friend who has known me for a very long time - and she implied that my transformation is the result of a mid-life crisis. This made me think, because I hadn't really thought of that before. Obviously, I would guess that most people who are going through these kinds of crises don't actually do so knowingly, so it's relatively easy to imagine that I wouldn't realize that I was going through one.
Nevertheless, this was the first time that I even considered it. And if I'm honest, I can't reject the idea out of hand. Having said that, though, I have reflected on it and I'd like to believe that if any sort of "mid-life crisis" is involved it is only part of a much larger, much more complex process. The timing is right - if you buy into the idea that mid-life happens sometime around 40 - but I'd also like to believe that I have been on a lifelong mission to improve myself. I've tried to tackle every problem that I've ever had, and overcome it. And I have some pretty big accomplishments in my life - things big and small that make me proud of who I am and what I've created with my life. Also, I've always like to make people question their perceptions about who and what I am. For example, I remember working at a hotel front desk when I was much younger - while I was working on my master's degree. At the time, I was very young-looking, and I tended to grow my hair long (more out of laziness than style). I remember telling my boss that I was working on a particularly difficult paper in one of my classes, and him being surprised that I was working on a master's degree. When I asked why, he said that he knew I was smart, but didn't think I was SMART. I still recall that anecdote like it was yesterday because I remember being very happy that I was able to shock him out of his preconceived notions.
All of this is prelude to saying, I have no real idea if what I've started here is the result of a mid-life crisis or not. But, I also have come to the conclusion that I don't really care either way. After all, we have this negative perception of men going through mid-life as they cheat on their wives and buy unnecessary cars, but if that energy can be harnessed into more healthy and positive behaviors, then a mid-life "crisis" doesn't have to be a crisis at all. Instead, I'd like to think, if anything, to whatever extent it does play a role, my mid-life events are more of a mid-life adventure than a crisis.
Nevertheless, this was the first time that I even considered it. And if I'm honest, I can't reject the idea out of hand. Having said that, though, I have reflected on it and I'd like to believe that if any sort of "mid-life crisis" is involved it is only part of a much larger, much more complex process. The timing is right - if you buy into the idea that mid-life happens sometime around 40 - but I'd also like to believe that I have been on a lifelong mission to improve myself. I've tried to tackle every problem that I've ever had, and overcome it. And I have some pretty big accomplishments in my life - things big and small that make me proud of who I am and what I've created with my life. Also, I've always like to make people question their perceptions about who and what I am. For example, I remember working at a hotel front desk when I was much younger - while I was working on my master's degree. At the time, I was very young-looking, and I tended to grow my hair long (more out of laziness than style). I remember telling my boss that I was working on a particularly difficult paper in one of my classes, and him being surprised that I was working on a master's degree. When I asked why, he said that he knew I was smart, but didn't think I was SMART. I still recall that anecdote like it was yesterday because I remember being very happy that I was able to shock him out of his preconceived notions.
All of this is prelude to saying, I have no real idea if what I've started here is the result of a mid-life crisis or not. But, I also have come to the conclusion that I don't really care either way. After all, we have this negative perception of men going through mid-life as they cheat on their wives and buy unnecessary cars, but if that energy can be harnessed into more healthy and positive behaviors, then a mid-life "crisis" doesn't have to be a crisis at all. Instead, I'd like to think, if anything, to whatever extent it does play a role, my mid-life events are more of a mid-life adventure than a crisis.
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